A Hundred Raised Phones

There are a hundred people in the room and not one steps in. That does not mean they are all cruel: the bystander effect is at work — the more people around, the smaller each person’s share of responsibility (“someone else will”). And fear of the hierarchy adds its part: to defend the victim is to risk taking the victim’s place.

Laughter and a raised phone are ways to instantly land on the safe side: I am not the victim, I am the audience. Yet research shows one person saying “stop it” is often enough to break the script — because they hand everyone else back the permission to see what they are seeing.