The Transparent Door

The author records the crucial fact: the possibility of stopping still exists, and Simon feels it — “clearly”, physically. Stop the car, turn back, forget. At this moment the point of no return is not a fact but a decision. And the decision is made in a characteristic way: by not looking at the door.

This is how the psyche works inside a script already accepted: openly refusing the choice would mean admitting to being the one who chooses — and therefore the one who is guilty. Not-looking preserves the illusion that everything is “already decided” and happening on its own. Of all forms of self-deception this one is the quietest and the most irreversible: the door is not slammed. It is simply allowed to close.